Red Lipstick Means I'm a Woman... Right?!

Every time I see a woman wearing red lipstick I think of elegance. When young girls wear red lipstick they just look like a mess. They look like they've been playing dress-up in their mother's makeup. But when a woman wears red lipstick, it's beautiful. They're classy, sophisticated, and elegant, and only a woman that has a certain amount of confidence can pull off red lipstick. Today, I wore red lipstick for the first time.

Today was actually a day full of firsts for me... It was the first day I wore my uniform to work... I got my first full month's schedule today... and then I had my first breakdown over my schedule and my new career...

Access days!? Jetway pickups!? Required Rest!? Legalities!? Swaps!? Pickups!? Deadheading!? I have no idea whats going on! I just know it seems like there are very few days where it looks like I'll actually be at home and very few days I'll be flying trips I actually want. In fact, this weekend will actually be the last time I'll be home until Memorial Day Weekend. I think... again... I still have no idea what I'm doing. I just know I've never been away from home that long before... and I still don't have a place to stay while I'm in NYC. And its starting to seem like I may actually have to move to NYC until I can get the hang of this whole flight attendant lifestyle. As I was driving home today I realized just how scared and nervous I actually am. So there it was. My first breakdown. After 7.5 weeks of training, it finally caught up with me.

After starting to cry a little bit I went to check my makeup in my rear view mirror... thats when I had another first. It was the first time I looked in the mirror and saw myself as a woman. There I was in my flight attendant uniform... driving a car I purchased myself after my college graduation... freaking out about a job that I got on my own... because I would actually be on my own... in my red lipstick. Then instead of being so upset, I started to feel proud. I know there are tons of girls that would love to be in my position. People dream of living in New York City and there I was scared to leave Powder Springs. Then I realized... I'm a woman now, whether I like it or not.

I am blessed for this opportunity God has given me and I am going to enjoy every second. It's going to be hard. It's going to be different. I am going to struggle but I will make it out a stronger woman than I was before. So then, I dried up my tears... held my head up high... took a deep breath... and reapplied my red lipstick.